News in Brief-Ireland’s Best Export Since Jedward Set For BGT Final
Laura Hughes, a single mother from Galway became an instant millionaire last weekend without even buying a lottery ticket. The unemployed thirty-two year old from Athenry was amazed to find eighteen million euro in her Ulster Bank account which had previously only housed a meagre thirty-five cent.
Sadly for Laura the added funds were an error then corrected by Ulster Bank, although not before Miss Hughes had time to test drive a new car she planned to buy with her new found wealth.
In other bank news National Irish Bank appears to have come through one of it’s most difficult periods with the help of Danish institution the Danske Bank Group, releasing figures showing an improvement in their operating profit by eleven million euro.
The group have championed their dedication to the Irish arm of their company with plans to reorganise and rebrand. Eivind Kolding, chairman of the Executive Board of Danske Bank has said; “We want to focus on our core business in Ireland,”.
How are they proving their commitment to the Emerald Isle? By renaming National Irish Bank, Danske Bank.
Not only are our banks being run from abroad but the face of politics is now being altered by a non-Irish man. Martin Critten, 54, from the North of England is to walk from Limerick to Dublin in an attempt to form a new political party.
Fed up with the states of the nation Martin Critten has launched his own website; http://www.sli-nios-fearr.com; explaining his manifesto and search for political partners to revive Ireland from it’s political pain.
‘We know Turkey’s don’t vote for Christmas’ Critten writes on his website, ‘we need to get people in Dail Eireann that are willing to make changes.’ An honourable aim, but Critten admits; ‘At the moment we’re totally visionless’. OK, Don’t start printing pamphlets yet. Critten hopes to reach Dublin by May 18th gathering a gang of supporters and interested members of the public along the way.
Is this a man we should get behind? Well you may end up behind him on the N7 as he walks his way across country.
More Garda stations are to shut nationwide in attempts to streamline the number of stations. It’s not clear when streamlining became management talk for means reducing but it can’t be coincidence that while the number of Garda stations decrease burglary rates are on the rise.
Dublin native Ryan O’Shaughnessy has made it through to the final of Britain’s Got Talent. The Fair City veteran puts Danny O’Dono-who? in the shade when it comes to love songs melting the hearts of millions with his song ‘No Name’.
Previously contracted to The Voice, Ryan decided to follow his song writing dream on BGT instead and now looks to become the biggest singing Irish export since Jedward. After initial contracting problems (once booted from the bottom two of Brian Kennedy’s group on The Voice) O’Shaughnessy was free to woo British audiences with his self-penned love songs and Irish charm.
Sadly for Ryan his lyrics failed to woo the girl for whom they were written, better luck with Her Majesty!
Another Irish Ryan is not proving as popular. Tubridy, 2FM’s wannabe Terry Wogan stepped into his 9-11am weekday slot after the untimely death of Gerry Ryan two years ago.
The history graduate climbed his way to the top at RTE after starting his career as a runner securing some of the highest wages across the broadcaster.
Famous for crying housewives and Tubridy’s psuedo-confession box style Tubridy’s radio show on 2 made him the nation’s favourite young fogey. But with popularity comes the public penchant for putting people like Tubridy back in their place. The show has lost 90,000 listeners in the last two years with many switching over to Ray D’arcy on Today FM. The Late Late Show is also flailing, accused of weak interviews and a weaker guest line up. Coupled with a poor reception at BBC Radio 2 in London last summer and a twitter blackout (caused apparently by a lack of time but more easily blamed on the vitriol of viewers and listeners) it seems Tubridy’s time may be up.
There’s nothing cheesy when it comes to kids advertising – well there soon won’t be. It’s a well known fact that cleverly targeted advertising to kids through prime time TV slots can cause chaos in supermarkets and dictate the diets of families everywhere. But now in a push to reduce childhood obesity, advertising watchdogs are now putting their fun deriding foot down and taking away our cheese strings.
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